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October 4, 2007
WASHINGTON: Strict Constitutional Constructionist and Supreme Court Justice
Clarence Thomas, in a surprise move today, stated that his vote in Supreme
Court decisions would now only be worth 3/5 of his white colleagues' votes.
"I cannot, in good conscience, go against the historic 'three-fifths
compromise' as our forefathers intended," said Thomas during a tour
to promote his new book, "My Grandfather's Son". "It would be
a disservice to the American people to go against my oath to
uphold the Constitution."
Liberal methampheticians have noted that, since all the other Justices
have one vote each, it would only be a symbolic change, as it doesn't
matter if Thomas' vote is worth "1" or "0.6" or even "0.0001" in breaking
4-4 ties.
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